I have always envied my sister’s ability to empathize with almost anyone. She has a gift. Her heart feels and she reacts in some of the most profound, heartfelt, and touching ways. I don’t have that gift. I should have once, and she had to come along side me and even tell me what to do. I remember telling her that in hindsight I should have known but it doesn’t always come naturally to me. I am an old soldier. When I hear of the loss of a soldier my heart breaks and aches and as a soldier, I know what to say and what to do. But then I had to pick up my ruck and move out. As a police officer I often dealt with people in their most dire moments. In those situations, I can understand and even empathize. But then I had to move onto the next call; probably just as dire as the last one. Where I struggle is when my friends and loved ones are in distress. I rarely know how to comfort them.
Today, when I jumped in my car to go to lunch, I found that I had received a text from my wife. She was asking me to pray for her friend. Her friend’s granddaughter is dying. She had been diagnosed with a rare and deadly disease and in the course of that fight she had developed what I understand as a secondary complication. She is not responding to the treatments and surgery is not an option. These are quite literally her last days.
I prayed, and I prayed some more. I don’t want this for her, I don’t want this for her mother, and I don’t want this for her grandmother. What a bitter cup to swallow. By the time I had made it into town I had stopped three times nearly in tears to pray. My heart is in anguish for them. I want to reach out to them. I want to take this from them. Anguish is the best description.
Maybe that is the secret to my sister’s gift. She has lost a daughter. She has anguished over seriously ill children in those unknown moments and the uncertainty of outcomes. Maybe the ability to emphasize is in the sharing or the knowing of the taste of that cup. I am a new father. I think this has moved me closer to a clearer empathy. I can’t help but think, “what if this were my daughter?” I can now sense the depth of the anguish. But how would I handle it? I know, this is an extreme form of asking God for patience. You have to be careful because in asking God for patience you are asking for opportunities to be patient. I would not want this cup and I am not asking for it. But how do we persevere? In the midst of my thoughts and prayers I was reminded of another cup; another cup of anguish.
Jesus’ anguish here is real.
“And he took with him Peter and James and John and began to be greatly distressed and troubled. And he said to them, “My soul is very sorrowful, even to death. Remain here and watch.” And going a little farther, he fell on the ground and prayed that, if it were possible, the hour might pass from him. And he said, “Abba, Father, all things are possible for you. Remove this cup from me… (Mar 14:33-36).” Jesus’ anguish here is real. Matthew records that in that anguish Jesus fell on his face before His prayer (Mat 26:39) and in Luke we read that he sweat great drops of blood and an angel was even sent to encourage Him (Luk 22:43-44).
I don’t know what cup you are holding in your hand today but if it is a bitter cup, a cup that you desperately don’t want to drink know that our savior can empathize. He knows the desperation that comes in the holding of that cup! But what got Him through? How and why did He persevere? Are you ready…? Because I know the answer and you are going to think it insufficient.
Jesus had a complete faith and trust that His father’s plan was good.
Jesus had a complete faith and trust that His father’s plan was good. Jesus ended His prayer, “Yet not what I will, but what you will (Mar 14:33-36, ESV).” He was resting in His knowledge of the Goodness of God.
Jesus knew who He was (Joh 8:23). Jesus knew where He was from and where He was going (Joh 8:14) and I have no doubt that the angel sent to encourage Him reminded Him of those facts. He also knew that what He had to do was necessary (Joh 12:31-32). Necessary, not for Him but for you and me (Joh 3:16). Finally, He knew that the one who had sent Him had not left Him (Joh 8:29).
Believer, do you know who you are in Jesus? Do you know where you are from and where you are going? Do you know that your God has not left you? Let’s be honest, apart from the hope of an eternity in Jesus we can only hope for more time between bitter cups because in this life more bitter cups are coming. But we, who are in Christ, know that a day is coming when our cups will be filled only with joy. “Then shall the young women rejoice in the dance, and the young men and the old shall be merry. I will turn their mourning into joy; I will comfort them, and give them gladness for sorrow (Jer 31:13).” My friend, who I know to be a believer, will one day be reunited with her granddaughter, who I also know to be a believer.
I pray that the fear of the Lord will move you to repentance.
Unbeliever, do you know who you are apart from Jesus? Do you know where you are from and where you are going? Do you know that one day you will be subject to the judgment of your God? I pray that the fear of the Lord will move you to repentance before it is too late. A day is coming when it will be. “I told you that you would die in your sins, for unless you believe that I am he you will die in your sins (Joh 8:24).”
Two things that I would ask of you as I wrap up this post. First, my friend will be reunited with her granddaughter regardless of whether God grants us a miracle. Her prayer has already been answered and her granddaughter has already been saved from death (Heb 5:9). I am praying a miracle for my friend because I want one for her and because my God is able (Heb 5:7). Pray with us for that miracle in confidence that God’s will is going to be done. Second, be patient with those who have not yet drank from a bitter cup that you may already know well. It is only a matter of time, and they too will taste of the bitterness of this life. When they do, and it is of a vintage that you already know, then they will need you to guide them through the tears that come with that cup.
Photo by Aaron Burden on Unsplash



